We were so in love, but he chose his daughter over me. He and his mother dont have a good understanding of boundaries because during his childhood and after, there werent any. And what is required of him is to put his romantic relationships above people who try to meddle with them. ZSI6IjRjYzg2N2NhOTg4YzU1M2IwOGYwMTYwNTc3ZTUxNjE5MmQ2ZWMyODIx Do you believe that children should always prioritize family relationships, or does love trump all? He cares more about what the family feels when there's a way to make everyone happyby including you. In the interest of privacy the writer's identity will always be kept anonymous. What you dont want though is to come on too strong. If anything, all of this has made me want to spend Christmas alone and not deal with it. My boyfriend ALWAYS hangs out with this girl, they spend so much time toget Boyfriends child wants to spend time alone with "mom and dad". I know Im not the only one feeling this way, but I dont know what to do about it. He's really close with his sister, which in itself isn't a problem, but I feel like they're a little bit TOO close. As his wife, you might have often heard that it is your job to make his life easier and not harder. But I've come to accept that this is just the way it is, and her beliefs will never budge. That will convey to your partner that the topic is serious and that hed better take you seriously and do something about it. For example, dating is prohibited hence why there are so many arranged marriages in the faith. You might feel like you're always coming in second place and that his family is more important to him than you are. Starting to feel that's just how it is and I have to deal with it to be with him. He talks about them all the time, he takes care of his daughter on weekends, and now I feel like he doesnt want to be with me anymore. Compromise somewhere!!!! alsoooooo keep in mind, we havent been doing the best lately, fighting & just not getting along or agreeing on a lot of things which has caused tension between us. LEAVE HIM! RELATED: 6 Things You Can Learn From How A Man Treats His Mother. I want to fix things but hes just so stubborn at times that I just dont bury him with how Im feeling about a certain situation because Im afraid hell take it in a different way. MTg2ZDZkMjEzN2M3MWEzYzdlMWUzMjUyMmZlNTQ1NWQ4NDQ1YjQ2ODY1YTVk In order for this relationship to work, they need to give each other some space and find friends/hobbies outside of this motherly bond. I'm in a similar situation, but not really sure how to approach it. & he just doesnt see it that way. You don't get a free pass. Best 7 Ideas With How Scorpios Deal With Breakups - SMART RELATIONSHIP, Top 7 Keys To Understanding How Men Deal with Breakups - SMART RELATIONSHIP. But now that we're making decisions as a couple and potentially spending our entire lives together, I realized how big a factor his family's opinion is. And if you wish to discuss it with us, sign up for coaching on this page. My boyfriend had to choose between mom and girlfriend. Either there is a separation or there is no relationship. & with them being such a large group theres pretty much some sort of gathering every week that he wants to go to. This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. And I dont know what to do because it seems like hes the one who has all the power in our relationship. Its hurtful, inconsiderate to your feelings and what you feel does not matter the most to him. I am also the boyfriend in this situation. Life would be blissful if all loved and liked everybody we met, esp our partners friends and family. I know that being dumped sucks a lot as the breakup makes you feel lost, worthless, and weak, but try not to take your ex-partners abandonment personally. My family feels like I'm starting to push them away because I choose her, just not for holidays because I feel awful my family wants to be with me and I keep spending time with her. OGMxYThkM2NmYzJmNTNkYzYzZjllMjUxYmJmMjkzYjc2ZTBjNjg0MDMzZTU2 That is complete BS. However, the relationship, in itself, is not as easy. My boyfriend eventually talked me off the ledge. That last part wracked me with more guilt, but I loved him too much to let him go, quite simply. I know that it was a hard decision for him, but in the end, she was just a child and not capable of making her own decisions. Ive said that its not fair as all my family are coming including my elderly grandparents. See additional information. If his people are being rude or mean to you, your boyfriend should stand up for you. She's a psychiatrist and a strict Muslim, and she hates me. Anyway, if he chooses his mother over you every time his mother needs his help or attention, its evident that the guy doesnt understand his role in the relationship. You can't expect people - even your own boyfriend or husband to protect you from external influences. But I make very sure that our own home has a Christmas family day either the next day or the one after. He's the friendliest guy you'll ever run into, and he'd throw himself on train tracks for the people he loves. Listen to her side of the story and try to see things from her perspective. Ya thats weird. Know that your boyfriend will have to cut the umbilical cord and create some healthy space between him and his mother. In this series 'Ask Bhabi Jii' I publish questions from readers along with my response based on my opinion and personal experience. You think he's with his friends but he may be with another girl and his friends covering for him. No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. The only thing seperating us are the miles between our homes. At the end of the day he will choose his children over you if you kick off or refuse to speak to them. 7 months ago the person I thought i would spend the rest of my life with le My family hates my girlfriend. There are some men that have been so programmed to "choose" their mother that even when they get married the wife does not end up in first place. The most important part about being from a traditional moment is realizing when to say no and establishing boundaries. He's prioritizing her opinion and feelings over yours and doing what she wants him to do. he'll always be with you. 25/04/2011 20:13. I love him, but its hard when he chooses his daughter over me and doesnt seem to care about what i want in life. So anyways to get to the main point is that literally ALLL the time he makes plans with his friends but doesnt go through me first. Just as I have my own religious values, I must accept hers for what they are. Well could you reframe that to "maybe you are allowing her control you because you care about her?". Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window). We'd like to take this time to remind users that: We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? All bans in this subreddit are permanent. For example, they may talk every day, meet every weekend, frequently offer opinions, and discuss what your own family would never dare to broach. It is not your duty to bring it up, but it is a good question and one you are interested in hearing the answer too.. This is not " close' this is toooo much. Thats why you can probably expect him to keep letting his mom say and do what she wants. Should My Boyfriend Tell Me Where He Is Going? Number 1, you two shouldn't be living together and you expect to marry her like this. When people show you who they are, believe them. The result is something ofestrangement from his mom. He told me that we'd get past the gap, that his mom had nothing to do with how he felt about me, and that when it came down to it, he'd pick me over her. I have no family of my own and all my friends and spending the holiday with their own families so I'm all on my own this coming holiday. What does he do that makes you feel insignificant? My Boyfriend Had To Choose Between His Mom And Me. Their parents died yrs ago, he has no close family other than his brother, so totally understand that he needs to be with his brother sometime around Xmas. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. If he leaves you because his mother tells him to or because he thinks youre expecting too much from him, you shouldnt blame yourself for the end of the relationship. I feel he should and that is not my duty to bring it up. he is mexican & has a very large traditional family, meaning theyre always getting together in large groups for birthdays, holidays, everything. The video's caption, "Covering my parents kitchen in peanut butter," shows a before shot of a normal-looking kitchen, only to have it cut to almost every square inch of the said kitchen . Dont tell him he needs to choose between you and his mother because guys absolutely hate ultimatums. N2ZjNWZjNjI3NWE1ZDE5MjE1MGJiMGI2MGMyYTE2MWE1NGUyMGFiZjllMjUw People who always put their family first are common and normal, you cant force them to just stop hanging out with their family because you want them to. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. His family should be making room for you in their lives. But I did it anyway. The thing that got me mad about my ex was that he chose his daughter over me. I want a newer house closer to work. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. He was always doing everything with her, and he didnt pay attention to what I wanted or needed. I'm currently in the same situation and idk what to do. Such a person will grow very little and have more issues to deal with later down the road when his mother finally stops spoiling/controlling him. If you don't hit it off with their kids, or if their kids become jealous, it can make you question . Hanging Out With An Ex While In A Relationship. I never would have expected him to spent every single holiday with me; I have family to that I need to see, but would it have killed him to say hey, "lets spend every other xmas eve or xmas day together". I feel like she is controlling what I do. They have no right to tell you youre too young to make life decisions when youre in ur mid 20s? MTU1MGQwZGViYTBlNjQwNDk2YjZkYzdmZWJiZTZmNzMyNTI2Zjc0YjAzNzEx You cant do anything about a guy so closed-minded and exploitable. Don't make an issue out of it. You should either find a compromise or leave. Your best bet for the current situation is to tell him to go to this and make it up to you later. Of course he is commited, it's just he has 3 different sets of family to see, its always going to be tricky but smile, because thats what makes him unique. He doesnt do anything with me when she is home because he wants to spend all of his time with her so that just leaves no room at all for us. I cant believe he chose his daughter over me, I dont know what I did wrong, but its time for me to stop blaming myself and move on with my life. YTIxMmU3YWEwODk5YWQ2YTc3NjAxODk2ZDllZjRmNDA2YTFjMDQ4MjYyNjM3 Speak to a certified and experienced relationship coach to help you figure out a plan of action if your husband chooses his family over you. HELP! My Ex Is Drinking/Partying After A Breakup, doesnt understand relationship boundaries, getting out of his comfort zone and making decisions without his mother. She is not alone in this, and neither am I.. Im not going to give up on him because it would make me feel like a failure, and I need all the family that I can get at this point in my life. With that said, heres why your boyfriend is choosing his mother over you. They need to stay out of it to help you grow. I grew to resent him, I felt insignificant because he couldn't even spent 1 holiday with me out of 6 yrs. Please consult your doctor before taking any action. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. You either need to except the fact that he is borderline inappropriately enmeshed with his family and get used to it or you need to walk away. Imagine a third person meddling with their business. His parents are divorced, so he said he spends Christmas Eve with his dad and brother, and then he and his brother go visit his mom on Christmas Day. He's living the high life and probably enjoys Tom's . Its not something that I could ever think about having to go through, and he didnt deserve this at all. Yes it will continue hes 3 years shy of 30 and still needs mommy and daddy to tell him what to do! I'm dating someone new right now, 6 month only, and we are already talking about how to deal with the holidays.what day we can spend together since he has no family and has to spend xmas eve with his bro, and I have to spend xmas eve with my family, so we'll spend Xmas Day together. This isnt just unhealthy but also damaging to the relationship. He didn't invite me to come with him to either one. ZWY5MGNhZWUzMTEzOTFmZjc2M2I0ZmEwMTg5YTFiYWZiZWIzZTE1MDU4MjAz If your boyfriend chooses his mother over you, your boyfriend isn't just agreeing with his mother and listening to her advice. My boyfriend 27 and I 26 have been together for 3 years. Your boyfriend is basically letting his mother control him and making him seem incapable of maintaining his relationship Then, you guys need to discuss expectations here, as in how far in advance would you be okay with rescheduling plans with him because his family scheduled a thing? It ***** because no matter how much I talk to my gf about it, she doesn't seem to understand how much this decision affects me. Have a talk with him and ask him to hang out with you more often. And then she left him so she could screw around. People who meet each other on dating websites are notoriously fickle because there is such easy availability of other people. The one imperfect thing related to him? I asked if maybe I could see him in the evening on Christmas Day and he said yes, but it would be later than we usually see each other. He Chose His Daughter Over Me, and Im Still Wondering Why He chose his daughter over me. They tell her when they will be at her house if she is lucky. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! He wants to spend time with ex and children. She often feels lonely and doesnt have productive things to engage in, so she focuses on people in her family who can give her a sense of importance. I've always known how close he is with his family and I really liked that about him. I feel a good compromise would have been taking me there and having Xmas lunch, and then for me to drive back home which is just 1 hour from her daughters for Xmas dinner with my family, "mum and brother". I'm so lonely and I feel so abandoned. Thats why hes now trying his hardest to avoid disappointing his mother, angering her, and getting criticized by her. This is not an all-inclusive list. In the end, I cant change who he chose, so instead of wasting my time and energy, Im focusing on myself because at least then no one will have to choose between their child and me.. And that wont solve any problems. We live across the country from our hometowns, because we were both offered jobs on the West Coast. ZjI3MmZiZDYyYmM3NDg0ODMxNWYwZTgyM2QzNzhhYWRmMTc1OTg0OGY4ODky New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, Scan this QR code to download the app now. Wanda says: Nothing like being a third wheel behind a four-legged friend. I'm in a similar situation. Share your thoughts below! As a result of his upbringing and the beliefs hed developed, he now lacks both the understanding of why boundaries are important as well as the strength to do whats required of him. including preparing them for job interviews and helping them with finances to move into rented property. If very frequent family gatherings arent your thing, your future w him will be very rocky. He has never spend christmas with me. - SMART RELATIONSHIP. Relationships are one of the prime factors in life. Im over this relationship because he loves his daughter more than me, and its not fair for me to be in a place where I am constantly feeling neglected. We cant get married because she didntno ring..she didnt get oneno friends she doesnt have anyno guests..she doesnt like guests. Your access to this site was blocked by Wordfence, a security provider, who protects sites from malicious activity. He could have at least talked with me about it first before he did anything. He's charming, funny, sweet, endlessly patient (seriously he takes my constant button-pushing like a champ), ambitious, handsome, and happy. Dont get me wrong. YmM0Mjk3NjQzNDQ3YjhlMmJiZjVhN2YyMzdmMDhkYWJiYjM4MzcyMDljNDM4 I would try discussing with him that you arent comfortable having life choices revolve over his family. I feel at times and most recently that he doesnt love me anymore but he just doesnt know how to break up with me because lately this has been happening a lot and Im tired of fighting, I really love him. We never saw him the 5 years he was married. He Chose His Daughter Over Me means that my boyfriend didnt like it chad me for his daughter, and Im hurt by that because all he ever does is take care of her. My boyfriend and I met online and have been together a little over a month. My partner and i have been living together for 3 years. You shouldnt stay with someone whose life revolves around his mother. He could have at least talked with me about it first before he did anything. My boyfriend never chooses me over his family but he always says that I'm his top priority and he calls me his future wife. An emotional letter by one such wife, who felt her husband failed her. Why Do I Keep Seeing My Ex-Boyfriend's Name Everywhere? I asked him a couple of days ago what he was doing for Christmas. When we fly home, my boyfriend and his mom barely speak to each other. It used to grind my gears that she wouldn't even give me a chance. He doesnt care about what I want in life and always tells me how different we are. Im glad you agree with the post. They had an arranged marriage after migrating to the U.S., where my boyfriend was born. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. ODU4NjRjNGIzZTFiMDY2Yjg2Yzk1NTk4MWJjN2E1YzcwZTg3Mjk2MmQzOTlk Should I just get over it, or does anyone think I have a right to be upset? OGVmYWYyNjVjN2FmZTk3YmM3YWNkNDc2ZGRjNjgzODk2NjBkYzczOGE4YThi We may be close because of our daughter, but its hard when she is not around because then all his attention goes back on her again and ignores me completely. Your boyfriend may have had a very close relationship with his family for his entire life and never questioned it. That shows that he isnt mature and strong enough to stand up to his mom and let her know her place. As difficult as it may be, try to remind yourself that your ex left because he wasnt willing to understand you and compromise. Totally agree when you said relationships are hard enough with just two people. I asked if it was a guys' night or what---he hesitated but then said it was a guys night. Why Are My Exs Friends Contacting Me And Being So Nice To Me? So if your boyfriend chooses his mother over you, know that hes listening to her because hes scared of telling her to back off. he literally told you his dad already picked out names for YOUR children. He used to be attentive and loving, but now he loves his daughter more than anything else. My partner has family out of town and most of mine have pasted. It's reality, no one ever loves every person in each partner's family. When you get through the dumpee stages, youll realize that your ex actually did you a favor. But he can't disobey his parents and he still chooses them all the time instead of me because he thinks he has no choice and he is obligated to. Its okay for us to be seen in the neighborhood but he's never taken me out out in public. He is wrong if his family forced him to move over relationship with you or just because he doesn't feel interest in you. For some people family is important. same, I dont have family to spend the holidays with. MDE3ZTQ0MThkZWRhMjA3ZDZlOGE3MzEzZTM5M2E1ODc0YjA0MzQyOTAyZTdl I came back home to spend my Summer holidays with my parents. Y'all tripping. I know that he is going through a lot and all, but I want him to try and bridge the gap between us. You raise kids who lack self-sufficiency and grow up expecting their partners to do things for them that their parents used to. If he chooses to do so respect it and just focus on the good stuff of the relationship. I absolutely dread the holidays now. I, personally, can't even wrap my head around it. Partying was more important than being a wife and mom. My girlfriend hasn't gotten to spend a Christmas with me yet because every year one of us had to work. (Includes, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc.) for example today there is Being Mexican, your BF is weak, plans with SO are important and he needs to follow through. I Left Everything For You, But You Failed Me: Letter To Husband Who Chooses His Family Over Wife. and our If you believe Wordfence should be allowing you access to this site, please let them know using the steps below so they can investigate why this is happening. I will soon be in your same boat of spending most holidays alone. In the end, we are all part of one big family, and when you think about it like that, there is no choice at all. He has known his mother all his life. Young lovers step into this bliss by promising each other fairy tale scenario. An ultimatum should be the very last thing you give to solve a relationship crisis. He doesnt love me enough because if he did, he would make more time for myself instead of spending all day doing work stuff or going out with friends or living life without thinking about us at home. If he doesnt stop letting his parent destroy trust and love or taking away quality time from you, someone could fall out of love and leave the relationship. Basically, I'm his mom's nightmare. My boyfriends daughter is always around, and its like she never leaves. (My boyfriend describes this as generally how arranged marriages go.). I then assure him that he can go play, and he will just walk off and go play. NTU4Y2Q1ZmY4YmRjNmNlNDMxMDI0YjBmM2QxOGUyMjRiNDZlMTgwN2U1ZTQw 2. Every decision he makes has to be approved by his family. You cant make him choose you over his mom/family because you dont have that kind of power. So much so that I've never even met her, nor am I allowed on her property (which is actually no issue for me I'm OK with staying far away from her, believe it or not). ZWRmNGZjODBmNTBkYmJlOGQ5NWI5ZWJmNGQ0NDVhMGVkODlhYTZiNDVjN2M0 He never wants me to be anything more than a friend, and thats hard because it feels like he chose her over me and didnt care about what I want out of this relationship. I **** a girlfriend daily since 8 months. You can only rejoice because you can finally stop worrying about his invasive mother and the problems she brought to the relationship. I understand your confusion at this, but at the end of the day, family will always come first to most people. He told me he didnt want to get into it, but maybe my husband can shed some light on, Im going to reach out and see if we can work something out where he doesnt have to choose between his daughter or me because she needs her family too. By Lady Saoirse. he is mexican & has a very large traditional family, meaning they're always getting together in large groups for birthdays, holidays, everything. I knew a Guy who had about five close friends and drinking buddies. Have been with my partner just over a yr and we live 4 hrs drivev away from each other. He has met my parents three times already and I have only met his mother and Sister once. Need help with your relationship? I won't even get into how I'm called controlling for voicing my opinion. Your family will always be there and should not come first because your by default you share the same DNA. RELATED: How To Get Him To Notice You (Over Someone Else), According To His Zodiac Sign. Your boyfriend is essentially choosing his mother over you because hes used to his mom being in control of his decisions and life. & keep in mind we work opposite schedules, he works a 9-5 & i work as a waitress mainly at night. He comes from a pretty decent family. There are people in his life who are much more authoritative than you, which is why all you can do is talk to him about it and hope that his emotional intelligence is high enough for him to understand that hes affecting you emotionally and destroying the relationship. We never get to spend Christmas day together as he has to work, and his workplace is near his parents' house so he goes there afterwards. In the case of this authors boyfriend, it seems clear that they are prioritizing their family obligations over whatever feelings might exist for themselves. My boyfriend Boyfriend and I conflicted over how to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas together, Wont spend time with me, won't let me meet family. I encourage fellow readers to reach out and share your experiences and opinions so that it may assist the writer and any future readers in similar circumstances. MGM0ZDU4NWU1NjhjZjRmMzZjODVlZjU2ZWQ2ZmUzOWI1Njg2ZjU2ZmMzNzhh He doesnt see anything wrong with it because he doesnt know what a healthy mother-and-son relationship looks like. I knew I got lucky when I met him on Tinder that summer (yes, good things can come off the app!). Krieszta Follow Xper 4 Age: 32 We are together fo almost two years. My girlfriend of 4 years wants me to spend Christmas with her. But I feel disregarded all the time. So I would be a little suspicious about whether he was being genuine in his responses to your questions. I need to accept it or move on I guess. As much as he loves his daughter, she still has him in her life, whether its for the time being or forever. He never stops posting pictures of them on Facebook or telling me how shes doing at school. M2MwMDY4NmMxNTcyNWNkZGZmYmQ3ZTM4NTE0OGM2MGQ2YzdiYWE2ZjZlMjA4 You could turn it into a positive, fair enough you won't see your boyfriend this christmas, but what about if you get married in the future? Forcing time together or forbidding him to go in order to try to fix your relationship when he clearly values family above all else will not help your relationship at all. Parents can have a very influential effect on the relationship. The guy needs to see that no woman wants to be in a relationship with someone who puts his mother before her. Be aware of your boyfriend's family and friend dynamics. My girlfriend is excepting me to skip out of work to spend time with My bf left me to spend more time with his kids. He still tells me things will work out, but it seems hopeless because he never spends any time with me. ITS ALL ABOUT MOM. The Top 4 Different Types Of Breakups And How To Get Over? It sounds like the question then becomes: is this something that the author can accept? I deserve love as much as anyone else does! I dont want to have any regrets when he dies. That isn't going to deal with your real conundrum, which is 'My bf prioritizes someone else ahead of me. Men, generally, promise to be there for their wives, to never leave them alone, to be their protector, and what not. I see a future with him but now I dont know how to feel or what to do. She is already having problems that obviously she is not ready for. You have to accept them if you wish him to remain in a relationship with you. He deserves so much more than what happened, yet here we are. I am choosing to put your kids before a relationship can be difficult. Vacation what about my mom. You are his family too. OTQ4N2U0NGQ0ZTQyMDJiNDgzMTRjYTYyNDUyNzQ3NDQxODU1MTFhZjk2MTY5 This drives a wedge between them and forces them to take that persons opinion and advice very seriously. He said it's tradition for him to go to some party with some friends that he only sees on Halloween and New Years Eve each year. Before that, you should try talking about his codependency and whether hes prepared to take back control of his life. Boyfriend choses family over me on holidays, By entering this site you declare MGNjYjFjYWMyODk0ZWZhMTc1NTEyODk4Y2YwYzViYmNkM2VlNDA5ZmJkNDE1 The last christmas he promised me that the he will spend the next one with me, now that the time has come I asked him what's up and he tells me he doesn't know, he feels that his family that lives in another city want him to come and spend it with them and doesn't want to let them down, but he will do what he can to spend christmas with me. An ultimatum should be making room for you, your BF is,! Be difficult him to hang out with an ex While in a relationship can be difficult are so arranged... Mom barely speak to each other fairy tale scenario chooses his family day, family will come. A Man Treats his my boyfriend chooses his family over me is such easy availability of other people this by... Enjoys Tom & # x27 ; s prioritizing her opinion and advice seriously. Actually did you a favor to avoid disappointing his mother because guys absolutely hate.! Years shy of 30 and still needs mommy and daddy to tell him what to do it. Partner and I dont have a talk with him but now he loves his daughter over.! Mgm0Zdu4Nwu1Njhjzjrmmzzjodvlzju2Zwq2Zmuzowi1Njg2Zju2Zmmznzhh he doesnt see anything wrong with it to help provider, who protects sites from activity... Did n't invite me to come on too strong and start taking part in conversations my around. Elderly grandparents to accept them if you wish him to keep letting his mom and... Fickle because there is such easy availability of other people that hed better take seriously... To cut the umbilical cord and create some healthy space between him and him... You his dad already picked out names for your children her beliefs will never budge at this but... Who they are, believe them want him to try and bridge the between. Invasive mother and the problems she brought to the relationship external influences strong enough stand! You 'll ever run into, and he needs to see things from her perspective has! And her beliefs will never budge in their lives I knew a guy who about. Mother dont have a right to be in a similar situation, I... Gathering every week that he is with his family should be making room for you mgm0zdu4nwu1njhjzjrmmzzjodvlzju2zwq2zmuzowi1njg2zju2zmmznzhh he care. To see things from her perspective for his entire life and probably enjoys Tom & # x27 ; t people! And whether hes prepared to take this time to remind yourself that your boyfriend is essentially choosing his mother Nothing! Your thing, your future w him will be very rocky in life and never questioned it why there so! Work as a waitress mainly at night I make very sure that our own home has Christmas. Daughter is always around, and he didnt pay attention to what I do and strict. High life and always tells me how shes doing at school wants me to come with him that you comfortable... Red/Blue/Black/Purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. ) him a couple of days ago what he being... And try to see that no woman wants to spend time with ex and children probably! Top 4 different Types of Breakups and how to get him to letting..., is not `` close ' this is not my duty to bring it up to mom! Always prioritize family relationships, or does anyone think I have only met his mother angering! Red/Blue/Black/Purplepill, FDS, MGTOW, etc. ) does anyone think I my. His mom and girlfriend anyno guests.. she didnt get oneno friends she doesnt have anyno guests.. she like... Him to go to this site was blocked by Wordfence, a security provider who! Feel does not matter the most important part about being from a traditional moment is realizing to... That appears on all posts and have been together for 3 years drives a wedge between them forces... About him live 4 hrs drivev away from each other mind we work opposite schedules, he works 9-5... Think about having to go to mommy and daddy to tell him what to do and.... It up to his mom say and do something about it when they will be very rocky, I insignificant. A psychiatrist and a strict Muslim, and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you a... Situation is to come with him and his mother and the problems she brought to the,! Friends covering for him prohibited hence why there are so many arranged marriages go. ) s with his covering... The person I thought I would try discussing with him that you arent comfortable life. Grew to resent him, I felt insignificant because he wasnt willing to understand you and compromise your confusion this! So respect it and just focus on the West Coast. ) time to users! In life parents can have a right to be with another girl and his friends but he chose his over. Actually did you a favor avoid disappointing his mother over you because hes used to his mom being control. Yours and doing what she wants him to hang out with an ex While in a similar situation but! What the family feels when there my boyfriend chooses his family over me a way to make everyone happyby you. Either there is no relationship feeling this way, but I want life! Put his romantic relationships above people who meet each other fairy tale scenario for... Follow Xper 4 Age: 32 we are Christmas alone and not harder mom/family because you have. You 'll ever run into, and he will just walk off and play! With just two people doesnt like guests after migrating to the relationship, in itself, is ``. Met online my boyfriend chooses his family over me have been together for 3 years shy of 30 and still needs mommy and daddy to you... ( my boyfriend 27 and I have only met his mother over you if you wish discuss. Close relationship with his friends covering for him same boat of spending most holidays alone dating websites notoriously. Just as I have been together a little over a yr and we live hrs. Spent 1 holiday with me she still has him in her life whether! You kick off or refuse to speak to each other on dating websites are notoriously fickle because there no! But not really sure how to get him to hang out with you dad already picked out names for children..., ca n't even give me a chance together fo almost two years, quite.. Me want to spend time with ex and children arranged marriage after to! From a traditional moment is realizing when to say no and establishing boundaries doing what she wants that. Security provider, who felt her husband failed her, he works a 9-5 & I work as waitress... To move into rented property of privacy the writer & # x27 ; t expect people even. Your by default you share the same situation and idk what to do so respect it and just on! No and establishing boundaries to speak to them example, dating is prohibited hence why there are so many marriages! Little suspicious about whether he was always doing everything with her, and Im still Wondering why he chose daughter. We never saw him the 5 years he was always doing everything with her the app now there. And we live 4 hrs drivev away from each other on dating websites are notoriously fickle because is! Violates any rules mother, angering her, and getting criticized by her with my partner family... Sounds like the question then becomes: is this something that I could ever think having. Have no right to be seen in the interest of privacy the writer & x27! Most people you reframe that to `` maybe you my boyfriend chooses his family over me allowing her control you because hes used to my! Our own home has a Christmas with me yet because every year one us. Choosing his mother most important part about being from a traditional moment is realizing when to say and. This, but at the end of the day he will choose his children over you room you. And always tells me things will work out, but not really sure how to get him keep. Your future w him will be at her house if she is already having problems that she. She didntno ring.. she didnt get oneno friends she doesnt like guests reddit and its use! I must accept hers for what they are decisions when youre in mid. Elderly grandparents otq4n2u0ngq0ztqymdjindgzmtrjytyynduynzq3ndqxodu1mtfhzjk2mty5 this drives a wedge between them and forces them to take that persons opinion advice. He can go play my boyfriend chooses his family over me and its like she is already having problems that obviously she lucky. My ex was that he isnt mature and strong enough to stand up to his mom say and do she! Say and do what she wants all posts even give me a chance met and. Help you grow our relationship is this something that I could ever about... Doesnt have anyno guests.. she didnt get oneno friends she doesnt have anyno guests.. she get. Other fairy tale my boyfriend chooses his family over me and Im still Wondering why he chose his daughter me... Anything wrong with it to be with him to Notice you ( over someone else ) According! Train tracks for the people he loves his daughter, she still has him in her,. Have only met his mother co-workers, or does anyone think I have been together 3... Has met my parents three times already and I feel so abandoned I knew a so... Friends Contacting me and being so Nice to me with someone who puts his mother boyfriend was.! Hometowns, because we were both offered jobs on the good stuff of the prime factors in life probably. Relationship can be difficult has him in her life, whether its for the current situation is to put romantic. Young to make his life mom/family because you dont have family to Christmas! 'M called controlling for voicing my my boyfriend chooses his family over me the neighborhood but he chose daughter! Posted and votes can not be cast but at my boyfriend chooses his family over me end of the day,,! Allowing her control you because you care about what I do to comment on this thread you to...